Three Things I Wish I Had Known Before Having My Hysterectomy

3. It could take as long as ONE YEAR for the swelling and bruising of my tissues and internal organs to subside.

2. When the doctor says 8 weeks to recover, he really means 4 weeks of feeling like raw meat, 4 weeks of feeling chewed up and spit out, and then 8 months of recovery.

1. I will probably not be able to wear my regular clothes for a YEAR. This is information a girl needs BEFORE surgery. Shopping is required and cannot take place until after I have been cleared to drive, cleared to push a shopping cart with a faulty wheel and three children hanging off the side and cleared to rush around the store carrying an armload of clothes, pulling two children while frantically looking for a clerk to unlock the dressingroom door and set the other child free. All this while attempting to look inconspicuous in my flannel nightie and clogs.